Frank You Very Much

So this evening I glanced up at the clock around 5pm and had a sudden pang of guilt.  Somehow, time got away from me and I'd completely forgotten to cook (or even think about) dinner.  I blame the 6,000 Lego creations William received for his birthday - all of which required me to "help", where "help" means: "stand nearby in case I need you, but whatever you do DO NOT PHYSICALLY HELP ME.". Because touching a Lego means robbing my child of happiness.  Touching even a single Lego brick during the building process renders the entire thing POINTLESS and FREE FROM ALL JOY.

OMG with the Legos.

Ok, where was I?  Oh right.  Dinner.

So when Dave called at 5:45p to say he was on his way home, I confessed that he would be arriving home to a cold, dark kitchen devoid of all things Hot and Tasty.  He was pleasant, and took this news in stride.  But I felt guilty.  I mean, he *could* have said "dear God woman, you have no JOB, the LEAST you can do is whip up some dinner".

But he didn't say that, wise man that he is.

So I began the dinner hour by making William a peanut butter and honey sandwich.  And just as I was cutting it down the middle, Dave noticed that there was only one slice of bread remaining in the sack.  One slice in which to make himself a sandwich.

Him: Well my GOSH, is there only one slice of bread left? 
Me: Don't be ridiculous, there is another loaf in the drawer.
Him: You mean *this* loaf? (holding up a second bag with only ONE piece remaining.
Me: (meekly) yes.
Him: So... what?  You want me to make a sandwich using THESE two pieces of bread?  They're from two completely different loaves.
Me: Well, it's all bread isn't it?

Left: rectangle   Right: square

Him: HONEY! You want me to make a FRANKENSANDWICH out of this mis-matched bread?
Me: I suppose that is your only alternative. 
Him: Fine, but you're blogging about my Frankensandwich tonight.  The Internet needs to know about this. 
Me: (Feeling guilty, and in need of a public flogging) I'll get my camera.
Him: Now let me think of a title.  How about FRANKS A Lot.  Or Franks But No Franks.  No wait! I've got it!

Go FRANK Yourself.

My goodness, it's like he was reading my mind.