I spoke to an old friend today. Someone I haven't spoken with very much in the last year. But someone who has known me (almost literally) my entire life. Which means that a year of infrequent contact is forgotten in a matter of seconds and we are able to pick right up where we left off. She updated me on her life (wonderful! plus a new tattoo! WHOA!). She said she considered 2011 a good year because she had moved forward - spiritually, physically, emotionally. She's better today than she was a year ago.
That stopped me in my tracks.
Because for the first time ever, I find myself markedly WORSE in many ways than I was a year ago. I'm a good 10 pounds heavier. And my bank account is many thousands of dollars lighter. And emotionally Dave and I feel like we've been through a war. Not with each other, but with the world.
Now I realize that being fatter and poorer than I was last year is certainly not a tragedy. At no time during the last year did I consult a divorce attorney (or even consider it), which is amazing considering the stress in my household. My children are healthy and happy. I live in a lovely home. I have amazing friends.
And my health! Let's not forget that I have my health!
But still. I'd like for things to be better in 2012.
Which brings me to resolutions.
I'm always a little afraid to make resolutions at the New Year. It feels like a proclamation destined for failure. Plus, weight loss resolutions are so cliche'! PLUS? I've struggled my entire life (almost literally) with body image and weight issues. So making weight-loss resolutions seem especially fraught with heavy emotional baggage.
But I'm going to put my neck out there and make one anyway. In fact, I'm going to take "before" pictures. No seriously! I'm totally doing it!
Oh I'm not showing YOU. I do have SOME dignity left.
But I am telling you. I'm going to unzip this fat suit I've been wearing around. If I change nothing else, at least by this time next year there will be less of me than there is now.
As for the bank account. Well, I plan to appeal Google's decision to pull ads from this site (based on some unknown/undisclosed reason). I realize Google ads will not solve my financial problems, but it's a step in the right direction.
So there it is. The typical American resolution. Lose weight. Make a little more money. ICK!
I feel bad! I should be resolving to feed hungry children in Africa and teach homeless children to read and find homes for all abandoned pets! I should. I really should. Instead, I'm going to do something nice for myself. The children and animals of the world are going to have to get in line behind ME. At least for a little while.
What about you? Do you make resolutions? Are they big and grand or just cliche like me?
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You know me---I'm all for taking better care of ourselves. In fact, I wrote a whole book about it! :)
ReplyDeleteI think that when moms feel better about themselves, they are better able to tackle problems--their household's, their children's, their own, the world's.
Go, Rita! And remember the tips I put in my New Year's resolutions post!
I think 2012 is going to be the year of Rita! My resolutions are to be more patient. Talk about cliche!
ReplyDeleteI'm on the Take Better Care of Myself bandwagon too. This year, I'm starting with getting more sleep, even though weight loss and exercise is part of the grand plan, sleep is something I REALLY need to work on and will make the other two easier, I hope.
ReplyDelete2011 felt crappy to me too, at least the end of it. But yes, I have all the same things, my health, my kids health, we may not have any money, but we have our house and car and lots of extras.
And right at the end of the year, I found out that a friend has a little baby with a brain tumor and it was quite a reality check for me. I am very blessed. I hope 2012 is better, but 2011 could have been much worse.
((HUGS)) to you, Rita. Whatever we have to go through that's hard IS hard and there's nothing wrong with struggling with those things. All we can do is move onward and upward. Here's to 2012!
I'm going to work on just being happier. I'm like you- I have so much to be thankful for, but I feel like I'm always complaining or worrying. So that's me- just working on being happier!
ReplyDeleteRebecca, have you read The Happiness Project by Gretchen Ruben? It's wonderful! I highly recommend!
ReplyDeleteI haven't, but I'll definitely try it, thanks!!
ReplyDelete